DISCOVERING AND VALUING YOUR LIFE

James Houston and Michael Parker in their book A VISION FOR THE AGING CHRISTIAN, encourage older people to take time to examine their lives and recall their unique stories of faith, failure, endurance and success in order to value their past and to share it with others. It can lessen the effects of late-life depression and isolation. It is important to be honest and Christ-honoring not self-glorifying. Pride and boasting can have an ugly effect on our stories. Too often memoirs and autobiographies can be a list of accomplishments, travelogues and name-dropping. We can be kind to ourselves without sacrificing honesty about our challenges, disappointments and sorrows. Years ago I led a life-writing class at my church. Each participant wrote about an incident in their lives and shared it with the group. It was fascinating to hear a retired FBI agent tell us about a search for a Soviet spy which later on was made into a best-selling movie. Another lady wrote about contracting polio at a summer girls’ camp whose leadership tried to cover it up.

Here are some suggestions to ask those who are writing their life story.

• What is your spiritual story?
• Describe how you arrived at your faith or lack thereof.

• How was your faith helpful during troubled times, or not?
• Has your church been helpful in times of trouble or not?
• What books or teachers have influenced you?
• What is the most important message you want to share with your family?
• What is your earliest childhood memory?
• What were your family chores, if any?
• What was school like for you?
• What were your best or worst subjects?
• Who were your childhood heroes?
• Which world events had the most impact on you when you were growing up?
• What was the most valuable thing you learned from your parents?
• What was the greatest challenge or disappointment you experienced in your life?
• How did you deal with your own illnesses or those of your loved ones?
• Where did you live or travel to in your adult life?
• How have you coped with the loss of your loved ones?
• What do you most regret?
• How are you dealing with your physical challenges?
• What legacy do you want to leave?
• Looking back over your life what lessons can you draw from it that gives you satisfaction?
• What are you most grateful for?
• What, if any, unfinished business do you want to complete?
• How do want to finish well in life?